Incomplete Authority Network

My 8 year old son, Cole, and his friend Ian were inventing acronyms for their names. Cole thought of this one for Ian: Incomplete Authority Network. It's brilliant. Understated yet full of potential meaning. I actually feel like I could work at the I.A. Network. As a personal assistant to the undersecretary of committee relations. Hoping to one day make it all the way up to Midlevel Vice President in charge of policy review.

Ian thought of this one for Cole: Commenting On-Line Legacy Entries. He nailed it. In fact, I think I may have gotten an error message last week with this very phrase. I thought maybe it had something to do with blog comments? I didn't know what it meant so I just hit the "accept" button. That's pretty much how I deal with pop-ups and error messages and stuff.


Here's something else: Have you ever had a conversation like this with an 8 year old?

Setting - Cole's bedroom.

Me: Cole, where is your chair?
Cole: What chair?
Me: Your desk chair. The only chair normally in your room. It's not here. Where is it?
Cole: Oh. Huh. I dunno.
Me: You didn't notice it was gone?
Cole: No
Me: You have no idea what happened to your chair?
Cole: Nope
Me: You didn't TAKE your chair anywhere? Out of your room?
Cole: No...I don't think so.
Me: You don't THINK so?
Cole: Well, I don't think I did.
Me: But you might have? You might have picked up that chair and carried it somewhere and then forgot about it?
Cole: Maybe


It was in the hall bathroom. I didn't ask why. And I think there is a 50/50 chance he really didn't remember moving the chair. After all, he has gotten in the car in the morning with one shoe on but forgot to put on the other shoe. These things happen. Especially when you are thinking really hard about legos.

Hula Hooping Singing Cowgirl

This is my daughter Zoe performing in her school talent show a few weeks ago. She is 5 years old. She had been watching her brother play piano in the talent show the last two years and this was her big chance to finally be in it herself. I figured her main talent is cuteness, so we went with it. It was soooo fun to watch her perform. I hope you like it too.

Sad as a Robbed House

I know I've reached some ultimate level of something-ness by posting not just my own poetry on the internet, but my 8 year old's poetry. But seriously...I could only hope to write something this cool.

So with great maternal pride I present Happy Sad, by my son Cole. It was a second grade writing assignment to write about your feelings.



Happy Sad


I'm as Sad as a dried up river,
I'm as Sad as a robbed house,
I'm as Sad as a rotten egg,
I'm as Sad as a chopped down tree.
I'm as Happy as a warm fire,
I'm as Happy as a very rich man,
I'm as Happy as cole ice cream,
I'm as Happy as a played game,
I'm as Happy as completed homework.

That's how I feel.